What we believe is what we want to believe.

 These words were probably told by me in this very blog a few months ago. Although, I never anticipated such change of fortunes, I still was somewhat correct. Even though, the primary reason for such rise can be attributed to crude oil prices, which is not doing to much good to our deficit in Current Accounts, still, even a minor part of it can be because of us.

 Yes, us. The increase of so many food joints, retail explosion, technology advancements, product lines etc makes the word “Buy More” written in bold red letters in front of us, the buyers. Since, every year, with the budget, the finance ministers excludes people in certain income brackets from paying taxes, the virtue of thrift has become obsolete. Now, you may think, that I am slowly taking the lines of President Bush and his incomprehensible viewpoints, but when you do come to a point in your life when you somewhat agree to President Bush, you know the universe is wrong. And we need to correct it.

 By this time, you have probably understood, that my effective ways of reducing the villain of the story to ashes, are only but rhetorical and not practical in their true sense. But wait! After giving a lot of thought to the problems at hand, I have some quite simple ways of reducing the pinch of price rise which if implemented, can bear some fruitful results. Not for the economy mind you, but for your own self. Even if you are rich and filthy enough to not care, still, caring for inflation has become a fashion statement. Caring for inflation, is an absolute in thing. It is more like saving the world from global warming, adopting children from third world countries, doing aerobic yoga etc.

 Let us look at some of them.

1. Celibacy: This is the most effective and the most difficult method of the lot. You see, the amount of money we spend is directly proportional to the amount of people of opposite sex we interact with. Men need to project what they are not; they try to dress somberly, they try and implement manicures and pedicures, they do some funny things to their hair and what not. Obviously, cars and bikes, latest gadgets are something to be considered, but a large chunk does go for the chitchats in restaurants, and watching rubbish films all for the sake of that “special” someone. In case of women, my lips are sealed. If I were to comment on the likelihood of women spending quality time and money on beauty care only to impress Men, the feminists will be enraged. But if we were to seriously consider the reduction of opposite-sex interaction, a lot of inflation related problems could be solved. Women would find it very difficult to undertake complicated  shopping decision if they don’t have Men standing in one corner looking absolutely bored to death and Men would never need to spend time out of watching football in their televison which is quite a cost-effective activity.
2. Increase of Saas Bahu Serials: I understand that attaining efficient levels of celibacy is but a hard thing to do, especially, because it is against the Indian  norms. But, again not a problem. Increase the amount of Indian fictional television soaps and reduce the reality. This would progressively promote the need for starvation, to give long life to your husband. Or, women, if you don’t like the idea of starving for the husband, aim to attain enlightenment by starvation. In fact, I disagree now with my take on reducing reality television series. Increase them, to promote God, and God like attributes by the eternal tried and tested method of a perpetual struggle. The closer you are to God, the farther you will move from Inflation.
3. Say no to Communication: I also believe that a large amount of buyer spending is on communication. What is the need to get tangled in the world wide web? Or involving yourself in worthless conversation with another human being ? Human beings are but cynical, the world is made up of selfish people who don’t care this bit about you and your phone bill. You can do better things than living one-sixth of the lifetime talking to people you hardly know and in doing such better things, you can reduce inflation. Remember, you are doing yourself good, and the phone companies bad. Think about that poor little dog who keeps running around roads and ponds. Reducing inflation and preventing animal exploitation all at one go!
4. Know yourself: In creating full proof methods of isolation from people you will finally come to know who you are. What we are  possibly is only known to the subconscious mind. Don’t go out, don’t spend petrol/diesel, don’t read newspapers, don’t play squash in the club. Just try  to find yourself. In doing so, you may be able to find the genius that is hidden behind that face in the mirror. Who knows, may be you will find more ways to love yourself and that would do you a world of good, not to mention how much good it would do to the inflation situation.
5. Eat less, think more: Now would be the ideal time to utilize your isolated moments. With the global food crisis looming large and your weight issues getting bigger by the day, it is time to direct your energies to be fitter and finer. Reduce your visits to the nearest pizza outlet. Instead, jog to your nearest bank and invest and then don’t forget to jog right back to your house. Eating a lot of good food, reduces a lot of thinking prowess, because after every session of good food, you are already thinking about the next session and the contents of that. What would be more important now, is to think, understand and appreciate the inflationary situation and how you can do good things to ensure that they are in fact good. Utilise your time to think more about how to add more points on how to reduce inflation. And write to me.